The Parent Handbook, by Dinkmeyer and McKay, has some superb suggestions for building self-confidence in kids. I'd also recommend sending off for the Parenting Resources catalog from Glazenbrook and Associates, P. O. Box 138299, Chicago, IL 60613. They have an entire self-esteem series of books, audiotapes and videos that offer activities and tips for building your child's self-worth; there are resources there for teachers as well that you may want to share with her teacher. There are many ways you can help your little girl feel good about herself. I'm sure these resources will jump-start your empowering her in a myriad of ways. Remember, kids should be allowed feelings of disappointment, that's natural. We must be careful not to allow them to identify themselves as disappointment to us, their teachers and themselves.
Q
I have a 5-year-old kindergartner who,at times, can be very hard on herself. For example, she had to fill out a statement for class asking why she was special. She reacted negatively to this, saying she wasn't special at all, and that there was nothing special about her. She is also,at times,very hard on herself if she cannot complete some difficult task, or if she spills something, etc. Any suggestions? I want to build up her self-confidence.
A
Often when kids begin kindergarten they begin comparing themselves to their classmates on all fronts. It's not unusual to see a child's sense of self-worth and self-image threatened, especially one who may naturally be a bit hard on herself. You must encourage her in all she does, always helping her to frame realistic expectations of herself. Be aware of activities, talents, and interests of hers that offer natural avenues for her to feel competent.